i weighed myself yesterday for the first time in a long time and shit. i'd gained 3kg! i'm officially the heaviest i've been all my life. a new record!
after sulking and a bit of panicking, i started asking people if they wanted to sample my choc cupcakes. have to give away some of my fattening food before i eat them.
my cooking is improving, the eggplant parmigiana i baked yesterday was especially good. friends ooh-ed and aah-ed over it and devoured it. happy but i was gonna save some up. the potluck was successful though-- everything tasted yummy.
diane the queen of stir-fry veg was asking me to sample her dish as we were slaving in the kitchen. i gave her the golden tip-- if you want your food to taste delicious, just chuck as much oyster sauce as you dare into the saucepan. keep chucking, even when your rational side is screaming, 'all your hair is gonna bloody fall out!'. she actually followed my advice and the dish was awesome. oops.
my chocolate mousse attempted at cooking class sucked. i didn't beat the bloody egg whites enough so the air bubbles were obvious. will try again when i'm down to a weight where eating mousse is acceptable again.
never say die. hmm. i'm too optimistic right now-- i'm usually quite emo and depressed. sth off with hormones as usual, i suppose. been sprouting zits on my chin.
anyway must make appointment to consult doctor about my haywire menstrual cycles. my future kids! i must protect them!
the current super-positivity spurred me to swim in a bikini on friday. i flirted with the idea of opting out as i didn't want to fully expose my thunder thighs but was feeling like nobody would care.
swimming is fun [albeit a tad sore-inducing] though i'm struggling to swim correctly. ashley is coaching me so at least i know what to do-- doing it is another matter, however.
was shocked when we went to change and ash stripped in front of me. i realized i'd seen crazier stuff than most people but this is sth new.
it's kinda tough to swim in a bikini-- it seems to have a mind of its own and is forever swimming in another direction.
chatted to suat yee today and she filled me in on all the tricks to wear bikini properly. one was supposed to tie the back string super duper tight from the front before twisting it backwards and tying the halter.
was fun talking to her. her story about her tongue-piercing experience was eye-opening. apparently her tongue was numbed prior to being clamped with a 钳子 and the ring manually stabbed through the tongue from the bottom. eww. sadly, her piercing closed up when she removed it for disinfecting. kesian.
*yawn. winter weather is dulling me. just want to sleep all the time. thankful sleeping isn't a hobby.