since finance called this morning, i've been rehashing my original dilemma-- the should-i-chuck-this-and-return dilemma. it made me physically sick in my stomach when finance told me i had about $30k due. wtf! my parents' lifetime of hard work, frittered away by their not-very-smart daughter who doesn't even like what she's studying.
carrie bradshaw once said, '' i like my money where i can see them-- hanging in my closet. ''
but i can't see my parents' money going anywhere worthwhile. i can complete an identical degree in msia way cheaper. my mum always says, '' this is your education money. once it's gone, it's gone. it could be used to buy a house, but now it's being spent on you, so make sure you study hard.''
at least a house is material-- it's there. i can see it, feel it. but my education? seriously.. am i making sense? i'm worried that if dad agrees and i do return, i may end up getting stuck there for the rest of my life. but if i graduate here and can't get pr, i'll be stuck in the sh*thole with $30k less.
i don't know what to think.