Friday, 30 August 2013

brink

today i fought with the mother again.

maybe my threshold for her crap has been lowered by 2 years away from her.

or maybe her ability to push all my buttons has evolved.

but when she called me while i was out with my friend and started screaming at me for washing the cotton floor mats in the washing machine, something in me snapped and i hung up on her.

i was happy to listen quietly to the first round of 'you useless bitch! call yourself a masters degree holder?! when you can't even wash floor mats properly! do you know you can mess up my washing machine because of your laziness?! eat shit! all you do is play and spend money! what else do you do at home?! do you know how much you spent on your studies?!' but when she started repeating herself 'cannot believe you are a masters holder! no man will want to marry you, you horrible woman! eat shit!' i just hung up, turned off my mobile, and went to watch City of Bones with my friend. (i recommend it for the eye candy! Gothic Pixie Dream Boy!)

and then she had the nerve to call my sister and scream at her during her work hours! the fuck that is so unprofessional!

of course it ended with some of my stuff gathered in a box and thrown downstairs. when i returned home at night i discarded the Coach and Kipling bags she bought me from the box, then brought the rest back up to my room.

i passed on contract work in digital marketing because the parents wanted me back in Australia sooner. i did other shorter term contract work to compensate. i clean the house. i fold everybody's clothes. i break up with guys she doesn't like. i make everybody meet me at the mall near home so she doesn't have to chauffeur me around (parking is expensive, according to her). WHAT MORE DOES SHE FUCKING WANT FROM ME?!

she complains about my looks, my lifestyle, my friends, the way i socialise - i don't have enough rich buddies. nothing makes her happy. I JUST WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE!!!

seriously i hate this teenage version of me with so much angst. please let me live peacefully for 26 more days please. and please don't visit me in Sydney i'm scared i will hate the city i love forever.

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